She reached out :(

Hi all! I would love some advice if you are able and willing! I went NC with my uBPD mom (Queen type) late last year. I have felt better than ever. I don’t think I even realized the huge weight of trying to have a relationship with her. I feel like a new person.

For several months she left me alone, but now she’s written me a letter. It doesn’t seem like her words. I think either her therapist or ChatGPT wrote it. Additionally, she’s been in touch with my husband about “when” she can call my son for his birthday. Not if, but when.

The thing is… she never made an effort with my son before. Never called, never babysat (said no when I asked), and made excuses about why they don’t have a close relationship. So it’s strange that now it’s suddenly important to her to talk to him on his birthday.

My husband is deferring to me on how to handle her texts. I would rather never see or hear from her again, for my mental health. Since we’ve gone NC, even more memories of abuse and neglect have surfaced.

But then the guilt kicks in and I wonder if my kids will be mad at me later for this - Or sad that they don’t see their grandma. Would love and appreciate any words of wisdom, commiseration, or advice!! Thank you!!!