Help. I hate my baby.

I have a 10 month old who I used to just adore. She’s beautiful and so sweet. But in the past month, I’ve had my depo shot wear off, I’ve gotten my period back and stopped breastfeeding. Now on top of that, she won’t sleep, she won’t eat from her bottle. I get so angry at her that I just scream in her face things like “fucking starve”, “what is wrong with you”, etc. I don’t even look at her with joy anymore and idk what to do. I’m exhausted. I’m so angry. I’m so upset with myself. I feel so alone and awful and I just don’t know what to do. I tried talking to someone but the shame she made me feel for being angry about a baby made me never want to talk to a therapist again. I don’t know how to make it stop and I’m so angry at everyone because they just care if I’m going to hurt her that they don’t see that I’m dying.

Update: I did get sleep from 9p-6a last night. It definitely helped and I did not yell today!! At all!! I actually had a great day with both my kids (2yo and 10mo). My husband has been stepping up when he sees me starting to get angry and just steps in and takes over and has me step away. I also have an appointment with a psychiatrist on Monday. TY all for your advice and I will keep working on myself.